Being a small business owner can be a very lonely experience. You can feel isolated – even when surrounded by others. The pressures of getting the work done, keeping things on track, payroll, bills, putting out daily fires.
You tell yourself that you can get through this if you just keep plugging along. Work harder. That will fix it. Work longer, things will get better. Nose to the grindstone. Forge ahead.
You are convinced that you are the ONLY one who has it this way. Others who are successful (or you fantasize are successful), well, they just must have had it easier or were lucky or maybe they lied and cheated.
You don’t want to burden your family with your problems. You miss things: dinners, kids events. They ask why you can’t spend more time with them. Don’t they understand you are doing this for them?
You sometimes get angry for no apparent reason.
Let me tell you this. All those “you’re the only one going through this” scenarios running in your head right now.
They are just in your head.
All those “no one understands what I am going through” thoughts.
In your head.
All the imposter syndromes.
Just in your head.
All the worries and pressures – anyone who has or had a business, small or big, goes through them.
You are not the only one who is or has gone through this. Many others have. Many more will. The best thing you can do when you are frustrated, overwhelmed or just not sure what to do is reach out. Go online, find other small business owners (be aware you will run into some jerks, know-it-alls, or just plain asses, but don’t let those stop you.)
LinkedIn groups is a good place to start. SCORE (Senior Core of Retired Executives) is another place to look. There is no cost. One caveat with SCORE. You can, sometimes, get paired with someone you don’t mesh with. Let the office know and they can pair you with someone else.
Or you can be stubborn and keep doing what you are doing. Do it yourself, work harder, work longer. Wall yourself off. Let me tell you this: That route will not end well. It can lead to things like anger, burnout, blame, depression, business failure, marriage failure and regret. Not the route you want.
There are people who have been through what you are going through. People who want to help. Seek them out. Try to find a mentor. Preferably not in the same business you are (unless they are retired) because that can get messy. SCORE can be a good place to look for mentors.
Talk with your spouse or other family members. They are your tribe. They are the ones who care and worry about you. They may or may not be able to help, but they can listen.
And sometimes, that is all you need.
